Prayer 11.10.2008

Father God,

Thank You for this day You have made. Thank You for Your greatness. Thank You for seeing me and loving me in spite and because of myself. Thank You for creation. Thank You for giving me the ability to come before You, the Maker of Heaven and Earth.
I pray that I never spin the word of God to justify my sin. I pray that if convicted I will change. I pray that if approached in love and kept accountable that I will respond in a Christ-like way. I pray I will have the courage to keep others accountable, even when it doesn't go well. I pray that when hurt, I will respond as Christ would. I pray that if I ever feel wronged, I will not use gossip as my shield. I pray that I will never hide behind the name of Jesus, but would instead, embrace it. I pray that I will never tire of doing what is right. I do pray I would tire of doing wrong. I pray that even though the enemy can use God's own to hurt me, I will endure. I will fight the good fight. I pray for a Spirit of discernment so that I may protect myself and my family from what may appear to be harmless or even good. I pray that eloquent words will not entice me down a path that is wrong for me. I pray against guilt and shame when doing right in the name of the Lord. I pray for forgiveness when I royally mess up which I regret to say, is frequent. I pray I can forgive when needlessly hurt, time and time again. I pray that I will not question my motives when I know they were pure and Godly. I pray that I will question my motives when I know, deep down, they were not of You. I pray I will become stronger and better and deeper as I grow older, instead of just getting old and stubborn. I pray that I will not just learn the words to say, but I will live the word of God. I pray that I will be Christ-like, when in secret and when in public. I pray that I will not use any power I have over people in a negative way. I pray that what is done in secret will be brought to the light. I pray that as iron sharpens iron, so shall we one unto another. I pray that I will deal with things, regardless of how difficult they will be. I pray that I will not wrong my brother or sister by gossiping about things best kept private. I pray that I will not cut others down to make myself feel good. I pray that Christ will define me so that I don't have to be defined by anyone or anything else. I pray that the church will be the church. I pray that when I give, I will do so in secret so as to avoid the arrogance that comes from man's praise. I pray I will give as giving to the Lord. I pray that I will do my job to the best of my ability even though I don't enjoy it. I pray that I will be convicted about everything Christ says is wrong for me...coarse joking, bad relationships, gossip, unforgiveness, resentment, arrogance, pride, anger...keep me on track, God. I pray that Your light will shine through me, not just on me. I pray that I will never foolishly think my talents and abilities are my own. If I become arrogant with what You've given me, take it away. I pray that I will use what I have for good. I pray that I will hear the cry of those around me. I pray for those I've hurt, because I'm human and I know I have. I pray for those who have hurt me, regardless of whether they know they did it or not. Help me forgive as you forgive me, regardless of whether I have the right to be angry...such rights are not worth clinging to. I pray that you will give me boldness to speak when I should and the common sense and self control to remain silent when I shouldn't. I pray for everything I need, not everything I want..because I know that all too often I ask for a stone when you long to give me bread. I pray that you will be with me as I wait. I pray that I would not confess love in an unloving way. I pray that you will attack-proof my marriage and my home. I pray that you will make me a Proverbs woman. I pray that I would be the wife, mother and woman of God you have called me to be. I pray you will take away my victim mentality. I pray for the inability to make excuses. I pray for a clear mind, a kind heart. I long to be open minded when I need to be and close minded when the truth leaves no room for discussion. I pray that you will remove my constant desire to be liked, affirmed and vindicated ...for I know it is contrary to scripture to be a people pleaser, in fact, it's toxic. I pray that when I give, I will have the right motives, otherwise it is meaningless. I pray that I will hear Your calm, still voice in situations that are chaotic, loud and confusing. I pray that I will be able to point out the flaws in myself before I see the flaws in others, and that if when I see those flaws, I will address all things in love. I pray that what is best left in private will be dealt with between me and You and no one else. I pray for divine appointments when I need them. I pray that my desires and temptations will not give birth to sin. I pray against the ability to be self-promoting, passive aggressive and vile. Don't ever let my damage, damage others. Take away my hurt so I won't hurt other people. Don't let me bask in my brokenness even though I thank You for it, because it is the starting point of holiness.
I pray that you will never take Your Spirit from me...that my emotion will not dictate my faith. I pray that when my flesh and Your word differ, You win, every time. Never allow my relationship with You to be all about me feeling good. Help me withstand the Refiner's fire.
I pray for Your guidance, I pray for Your strength. I pray for Your courage to be the Christian You've called me to be in scripture, whether it reflects this culture's version of 'christianity' or not...I pray You will constantly be with me. I pray You will make me clean and new. I pray You will tackle my recurring demons so that I can become better, not bitter and in all of this I pray that I will know You and make You known.

I pray Your will be done.

In Christ's name,

Amen