Weird, when I spend so much time with the little guy, but on work days, I miss him very much. I know that working and getting a mental break from toddlerhood has made me much better for him when we're together. Full-time motherhood is not for the faint of heart...it's tough and I marvel at women who do it past babyhood, especially with multiple kids. Having a job outside of home gives me a little break to be better for the main thing, my family. I know Caden loves school, because he runs in with a giant smile, ready to play on the playground and make crafts with his friends....but yesterday was the first time since March that I got a little teary eyed when I drove away, meanwhile he was partyin it up on the slide, waving to me as I drove off, without a care in the world.
I think I'm suddenly keenly aware of how fast life is going...I am trying to soak up every beautiful moment and desperately want to push 'pause' most days...he is already so big and independent...far from the baby days...he's a big kid now and since he may be our only child, it's hard to see those stages pass.
I had a meeting with my boss today about working more hours and getting benefits...it went well. I'll be taking on some new hours and new responsibilties in the coming weeks making me full-time with an incredible benefits package...this will be great for the finances...my job will still offer me the flexibility to work from home 1-2 days a week so with Jay's weekday off and my work from home day(s), Caden will still only spend a few days a week in school. On top of that, I just discovered that an awesome woman my age who volunteers with the kids at my church, lives in Crawfordville! A serious answer to prayer. I have been wanting/needing someone local that I know and can trust, who loves kids and can help me with Caden but mostly just keep me sane!...I've been praying for the house to sell because of my lonliness and isolation in C-ville and I feel as though God may have said, "I'll take care of things in my time. Meanwhile, this should help."
Amber! I'm so excited about you being my neighbour!
She has also volunteered to help out with our animals while we're gone to NY this weekend. I am so excited to see the in-laws. I love seeing Caden with the extended family because those moments are few and precious. Jay's Dad will be turning the big ___ on Monday so we're blessed to be there for the celebration :)
Don't worry Bob, your 51 year old secret is safe with me....WOOPS! :)
I'm at bit concerned about Caden sleeping well, given that he has been a terrible sleeper for the past week (ever since we put a baby gate across his door to stop him from coming out of his room at 5am and drumming in the playroom) he has been protesting via screaming at the gate...last night he woke up at 1am to get some time in protesting, before returning to his bed and getting up again at 6:20 to continue the protest. The rule is we don't hear him till 7...or at least we need to make him think we don't hear him...really, we're lying in bed stuffing cotton balls in our ears trying desperately to get back to sleep...I'm hoping he'll be so exhausted from all the family fun that he'll sleep 12.5 hours everynight without interruption. Wishful thinking? Either way it's going to be fun. I am getting more and more excited as the days draw near.
Jay is feeling better after a bout of sickness and having a spot burned off of his ear...it looks like someone literally put his ear on the stove and held it there...or like someone drew a big spot on it with a sharpie...or he kind of looks like a dalmation...he loves it when I compare it to various things. :)
So to sum up: I have a great, flexible job that will soon have benefits, I have an burned-ear husband who is incredible and we're going to see his family in less than 48 hours (wahoo!), God has given me a C-ville friend who already knows and loves my kid, and although he likes to party all night, Caden is an amazing little boy with a big heart and when we're apart, I miss him.
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