This week Caden and I drove up to Atlanta to see Baby Ava and her awesome mom, Julie. Caden, who generally is terrified of other babies, did very well with Ava. He slept well, he travelled well. It is always very rejuvenating to see friends that I've missed so much and to spend time with another person who is in the exact same boat as me. Someone who can validate my feelings and struggles and offer empathy and understanding. Someone who can crack up with me about the comedy and joy of being a stay-at-home parent and make me feel less alone. I miss them already.
I find the only way for me to stay calm when driving through downtown Atlanta is to turn my music up really loud and sing passionately at the top of my lungs. I assume this probably cracks up anyone travelling around me who happens to catch my American Idol-esque performance. Last week Jerad made the worship team a CD of the songs we would be doing in church so we could practice and even though there were only four songs on it, I listened to that thing over and over on our trip. Two of them are the most beautiful songs I have ever heard, musically and lyrically.
There's a line in one of them that says,
"Let now the poor stand and confess that my portion is him and I'm more than blessed."
That blew me over on the way home yesterday.
I just pictured those who have nothing, standing and proclaiming that they have more than enough through Christ. That makes me want to fall on my face, getting as low to the ground as I can and praise God for who He is.
Like anyone I worry about money from time to time. I obsessively worry about the safety of my family and the well-being of my child. I experience moments of intense lonliness being so far from family and friends...but my portion is Him...and if all else falls away I have enough through God.
That is a serious silver lining to any cloud that floats overhead.
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