So much it hurts

This is a spin off of Stephanie's comment on my last blog. I was thinking of writing about this the other day but never got around to it. Stephanie's comment reminded me that maybe I should share my thoughts on this subject. Thanks Stephanie.
I love my family so much that it literally hurts my tummy sometimes when I think about it. Almost like nervous pangs in the pit of my gut when I think about how lucky I am and how wonderful they are. When I try to actually fathom the love I have for them, I either physically hurt or want to cry because I don't think my body can handle focusing in on all of that love.
I put my baby boy to bed early tonight because we have to get up really early for church and about 2 hours after he went to sleep I wanted to wake him up again because I missed him so much. I think I'm addicted to him. He is amazing. So sweet and pure and innocent and calming. When I put my face next to his he smiles and touches my hair and face gently and softly says, "Whooooooo, Awwwww." Which translates into: "I love you mommy." Everyday with him is more fun, beautiful, memorable, cherished and treasured then the one before. Every beautiful moment has a tinge of sadness to it, knowing that everyday he gets older and more independent...everyday brings him closer to saying, "Gross, don't kiss me in front of my friends mom!" But it's the same in reverse. Every moment of stress and fatigue is overshadowed by the joy of being his mother. Everyday brings me closer to hearing him call me 'Mom' and to hearing him say 'I love you'.
Everyday Jason and Caden grow closer and develop a deep bond that is strictly thiers. They look at eachother with an understanding. You can see in Caden's face that he knows Jason is like him. He watches him intently all of the time as though he is studying how to be a man. It makes me happy to know my son has a wonderful role model of how a Christian, husband and father should be. It also warms my heart to see my great big husband pick out baby toys at Target.
When I think about how amazing my marriage is and how much love and respect we have for eachother I can't contain it. I praise God with every fiber of my being for it. Some people are not as fortunate as me to be married to their best friend. Others are not as fortunate to have healthy, happy children.
We may live in an apartment for a long time, we may always be a one car family, we may never have the things that other people have but we have something much, much greater.
Thinking about it overwhelms me.